Waiting for the Drug Raid

Lawd ya'll, I didn't think I would survive the weekend.

Last weekend was spent with Ma at Shady Pines, the ER and a second hospital (she's fine, no worries, we'll save the details for another post,) so by this Friday, my little trailer was lookin' like a frat house. Long story short, I sprained my thighs squatting in front of the fireplace, trying unsuccessfully to start a fire, then had a mini anxiety attack when the light bulb blew in the fridge. I thought the whole dang thing had died. I was flippin' breakers and wiggling plugs.

I nearly Snoopy danced in the kitchen when it finally kicked on.

The other day I received a letter from the power company with a cute little graphic showing how I was using like.. a shit ton of electricity. I'm pretty sure the po-po are going to show up any day to raid my grow-op. They will be greatly disapointed.

I know it's from using the space heaters, but dang.. a letter.. really?

Now that Spring is on it's way, I've decided we can get by with just the fireplace to take the chill off at night, which would work great if I could start a feckin' fire. I spent hours trying to get one cranked up yesterday so I could dry some clothes for work today. I did manage to work up a sweat, what with the poking, flipping wiggling and shifting logs.

Fireplaces shouldn't be on the floor. This crawling around on my hands and knees with a flashlight to find the stupid damper lever thingie is hard on a old woman. I never did figure out which way to push it to open the damper. When I went home at lunch today, The Amazon was down there doing the same thing.

Anywho...

Ya'll have a great Monday. It's almost over.

Later Taters!

7 comments:

Travel said...

So Twerking is not on the agenda for this week?

Mahala said...

Travel, my Twerker is broken. Twerking will resume at a future date.

kenju said...

I always hated trying to open the damper on our fireplace, which resulted in no fires for the last five or so years we lived there. Then when the tree fell on the house and damaged the chimney, it was all remade and I couldn't remember what the man said about opening the damper. There has to be a better way.

Mahala said...

I'm starting to think I need better wood. Maybe it's too green.

Cricket said...

My Bing-fu tells me that standard is to pull down to open, push up to close. Now, that does assume that yours is a standard setup....so possibly I did not help at all. But I am sending good thoughts, so there's that. :)

Mahala said...

I'm going straight home at lunch and writing that on the wall with a Sharpie

Aarin said...

if you are having trouble getting one started, try to get your hands on dryer lint- campers and survivalists use it to start fires. it holds flame long enough to catch the wood on fire (assuming its not too green as you suspect)