As much as I'd like to tell you I've always embraced the flight of my freak flag, the truth is I've strived for normal. My goal has always been to look normal, act normal, anything to shield the world from my own little internal shit storm.
You get up, go to work, get your paycheck, pay your bills, go home and go to bed. Rinse and repeat, Monday through Friday, add a little partying on the weekend and voila! Somewhere along the way, you find a significant other, go forth and multiply, grow old together, sit around farting and scratching until one of you dies... you know.. life.
I'd already given up on most of "normal." I no longer need or want a significant other and my breeding days have long past. I was trying, however, to hold on to the working part of normal, at least to some degree. I've accepted that it's going to be damned near impossible for me to find a regular job, less than an hour from here, which, unless they're going to pay me a doctor's salary with my G.E.D., isn't going to work.
I was determined to find a work-at-home customer service job like I had before, but companies with positions available either require newer computers or faster internet, two things I can't do anything about right now. I've applied to a total of about 8, I've been through three interviews and offered two jobs, but there always seemed to be a roadblock.
When you keep running in to a brick wall, it's time to change lanes.
In the meantime, I've been struggling with my sleep schedule. It's not insomnia. I can sleep, usually right around 8 hours a day, but not at night. Today I was up at 4 p.m. I have taken all kinds of crap to try to make myself go to sleep earlier. I've stressed out to the point of crying, because how can you find a job, working a set schedule, when you can't get up?
So, I've been thinking about normal. Is it abnormal to sleep all day, coming to life just as everyone else is settling in for the night?
Is it worth getting in a wad over? Absolutely not.
Since throwing my hands up and admitting defeat over the work-at-home, slave to the phone job, I've been exploring a freelance writing career. I had to finally admit that the phone thing wasn't going to work anyway, with Fat Kitty soaring across the room like one of the Flying Wallendas, landing on the back of my chair and chewing on my hair every five minutes or Ayla spotting a hiker out of the kitchen window and going all Cujo.
I may not have kids, but I don't have a "quiet office environment" either.
I've been writing for one company, off and on, for a few years. The pay has been, well, terrible. There was no way I could make a living wage from it, but I was recently offered a few, more profitable opportunities from them.
It's a sign ya'll.
I've also applied to another company that provides blog posts to large companies, whose forte' may be more nuts and bolts than a flair with words. I've been through a multi-leveled approval process and am currently waiting for news on the final step. The pay is good and writing blog posts? I can do that.
At least, that's what ya'll keep telling me.
I've also got an application in with a company that does internet research for corporate accounts. Again, I went through several testing steps and am currently waiting for the final word on the last step. I have no idea how it pays, but getting in seems pretty competitive, so fingers crossed.
Most importantly, what better job for a middle-aged-vampire-hillbilly? Write all night, sleep all day. I always have been kind of a night owl anyway.
Admittedly, I think the problems I was having with... as T.A. and I call it... The Beetis... is what got my sleep all kittywampus. Slowly, it's getting back to normal. Well, normal for me.
But wait, there's more!
In addition to all those plans, I've got a new blog in the works. I played around with some "blog for profit" type formats before, but I was still an inmate at The Cubicle Asylum then and didn't really have time to do it properly. I'm planning a Gypsy/Boho Style site, I'll let you know when I get it up and running.
I know, ya'll are over there like... "Mahala has a new idea every two weeks. IT'S GETTING TIRING AS HELL."
I know ya'll. I know.
But my unemployment runs out in September. Something's gotta work.
Anywho, ya'll have an awesometastic, booty kicking, chocolate lickin' weekend. We'll talk again soon.