Monday, August 20, 2012

Mahala's Words of Wisdom

It is 5:20 pm. I left work at 5, with plans to come home and mow at least part of the yard. In the twenty minutes since I left the asylum, I have experienced an exploding boil upon the tenderest of lady parts, been poked in the boob with a hand saw, had a Christmas tree fall on my head and come dangerously close to getting my head stuck in the closet door while bent over in the booty nookie position.

Sometimes The Universe says, "I've got your back," but sometimes? Sometimes it says, "Screw the mowing, lay your ass down before you kill yourself."

Later Taters.

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4 comments:

kenju said...

And I certainly hope that you listen!!

Unknown said...

Wow, the Universe sure does care about you to be literally hitting you over the head with warnings, but did it have to include an exploding lady part boil? That seems sort of extreme.

tiff said...

Good thing you can hear that voice - some people don't!

Dorkys Ramos said...

Yeesh! I agree. And wear a helmet while you're at it.