Uncle Mullet, Riding Ponies and Baking Cakes

Some people weren't into bikes this weekend, preferring the old fashioned way of getting around.

Aunt Moses called Ma yesterday, telling her to get some clothes on, brush her hair and go sit out on the porch, she was bringing something to show her. Luckily, I was on my way out the door to make a run to town, 'cause I had a pretty good idea of what the "something" was.

As I climbed in the truck, I saw Aunt Moses pull in behind me. There were two people in the cab of her vehicle, one I recognized immediately.

Uncle Mullet.

I knew he'd be in town. He considers himself part of the biker scene, although I'm pretty sure if he'd ever met any of the real bikers I ran around with in Ocean View, back in the day, he would have pissed himself with fear and curled up under the nearest barstool in the fetal position.

For those of you late to the game here at Hidden Mahala, Uncle Mullet was married for a long time to one of the few halfway normal acting people in our family. Unfortunately, he stayed drunk every weekend, when he was off from his railroad job.. just like his daddy did and slept around with every skanky ho from here to Boston.

He talked to my aunt like a dog and kept her having babies right up into her forties. He liked to point out to her how much nicer this cousin or that one looked than she did, they weren't fat.. why was she? And, oh my Lord, how she would do anything for him.. that's what sickened me the most.

She died two years ago after having repeated surgeries to correct the gastric bypass she'd had. Oh she lost weight... and her hair fell out.. she aged 20 years in five. Her body just finally couldn't take anymore.

So he got what he wanted.

He came by yesterday to show off his new, twenty-something, skinny wife. It made my stomach turn.


I had to stop at the ATM for Ma. When I got back to the truck, I saw this emerge from between two buildings:

While I question the judgement of anyone who'd go trail riding through Frog Pond Holler while there's a feckin' HARLEY RALLY going on, it was still cool to see.

I miss riding horses.

Ah well... someday.

I slept too long yesterday. It wasn't that "I think I'll close my eyes and take a mini nap" kinda over sleeping. It was the "I wonder if there's any instant coff.. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz" kinda sleep. I had to fight to make myself wake up at 1 o'clock. Once I came to life, I managed to get all the laundry caught up (a miracle.. believe me) and rearrange the bedroom. Oh and I baked the most beautiful, incredible tasting, pineapple upside down cake you've ever seen. I wanted to take a picture, but it's been pretty much slaughtered.

The Amazon said it looked like a Christmas ham. Don't worry.. I only threatened to whoop the snot out of her.

I've still got Rice Krispy joints this morning ("snap, crackle, pop") but not as bad as yesterday. I'm gonna take it easy, maybe work on some website junk today. I hope ya'll have an awesome Sunday.

We'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!


Significant Snail said...

...and someday uncle Mullet's 20 something wife will get tired of his old ass and find a younger man...LOL!
I'll be waiting here to read about it. What an ass. I a can only hope karma comes around to bite him back.

BetteJo said...

I just love his name!

Inanna said...

I hope karma bites him real hard!