Last night, as I sat indian style on the couch in my black, Mexican style muumuu, eating soup beans and cornbread, I watched the heads of the big three auto manufacturers trying to justify flying to D.C. on private jets (three separate private jets) to ask for bail out money.
Did ya'll see it? Do you reckon they realized how stupefied they looked, sitting there with their deer-in-the-headlights looks? Am I supposed to have this sudden urge to hand a kabillionzillion dollars over to them, while I'm trying to figure out how to buy the fixin's for a Thanksgiving dinner, for three people, with the $28.82 I have left in my checking account?
Hey Washington, listen closely and you'll hear the country screaming a collective "WTF?"
Okay, I don't have the answers.. well not all of them anyway. I know that if something isn't done, the domino effect is going to tear through the American economy, ripping businesses up by their roots, sending unemployment soaring and basically sending us in to a suspended state of FUBAR, but a part of me feels like we have to let them fail in order to bring about change.
There has to be a middle ground. I just thank God it's not my job to figure out what that is.
But private jets? SERIOUSLY????
Maybe Toyota or Volvo will move in to the empty factories and replace some of the jobs that will be lost. I heard something about a loan program for auto manufacturers, implemented by the government, for the purpose of designing more fuel efficient, economical vehicles, but the three big guys don't want to bother with that.
Lawd have mercy, this mess has me all in a wad. Does it show?
Oh and another thing, ya'll realize that we've started something with the last bail out.. right? Now there's going to be a line all the way around Washington D.C. of companies who'd rather beg for a handout than cut back on their corporate sponsored parties and little jaunts to God only knows where.
I think I'm going to have to take up drinking again.. and possibly smoking. If the plant gets shut down, I'll be able to afford it. We all figured out we'd draw more on unemployment, based on our full-time salary than what we make working short weeks.
Anywho.. if I don't completely snap and freak the eff out before the day is over.. I'll see ya'll tomorrow. If I do snap, ya'll will see the story on CNN about the ample, hill dwellin' woman (with the bodacious tattas) who was discovered after dark, wandering naked through the streets of Washington D.C., with a big pair of pursed lips painted on her left ass cheek, carrying a big sign that reads, "BAIL THIS MOTHER HUMPERS!"
Later Taters!
P.S. See what some fellow Plurkers had to say about the bail out last night.
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7 comments:
Once again you manage to crap me up. I might very well be along side you wandering the streets ... "bodacious tatas against big business bail outs!"
I think that the government ought to require the ceo's to give up their outrageous salaries in order to get a bailout. Otherwise, we are giving them the means to fly those jets, throw parties and spend promiscuously!!
I saw that on the news today. Couldn't believe it and they truly did look scared to death. I'd be really interested to know if things go belly up how it would affect their lives personally. Seems hard to believe it would be the same as all the 'ordinary' folks out there. Anyway. Don't be gettin nekkid. It's cold out there. Ok well it's cold here. Enough to freeze the nips right off those tatas!
Let me know when you're driving up and I'll make a sign and come with you. This is farking ridiculous. They are so out of touch it's sad.
they keep talking about how it'll crush the whole country if they lay off all those workers. but (according to a guest on NPR, i forget who), the money they're asking for works out to roughly $500,000 per worker. so all those folks could receive extended, expanded unemployment, be sent to school, get relocation grants ... of course, this doesn't do much for the guys with the jets. and we can't have them running around the airport with a little tin can begging for jet fuel money, right?
As with the CEOs of the oil companies, I have no sympathy for the big three execs. THey probably have enough money stashes away to keep them nice and comfy for a long while.
I do feel for the employees, though the 70 dollar an hour union worker who puts bolts in car doors is, admittedly, gettng a pretty good deal.
The parts suppliers are goign to get hurt if the car industry tanks, that's for sure. Those people are in big trouble, as are the towns that support the factories that make those parts.
So, let's see the management of those companies changes, loan the big three some dough if they need it, but NOT bail them out. They need to figure out a way to stay solvent on their own after the first modest infusion of cash that should keep them afloat.
My two cents. I'd love to join the ta-ta parade in DC, but it's COLD out, and i'm a wuss. I'll wave a placard in your honor as you go by though!
Let 'em file bankruptcy like normal people do when they get in over their heads. NO.Bailout!
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