Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Negotiating With Mr. G

Lawd have mercy! I take off two days and the whole Asylum goes to hell in a hand basket. Within thirty minutes of getting here, Bossman had already pitched a screaming fit, cussed one of the floor supervisors and damn near blown an artery.

Gee golly it's good to be back.

I was sorta sickly the whole time I was off, so I didn't accomplish much. I think it's my gall bladder. Me and Mr. G. Bladder had a little discussion late last night:

"Dude.. seriously? I can't afford to have you evicted right now so I'm going to need for you to settle your little ass down and stop partying all hours of the day and night. Got it?"

"Ohhh but Mahala, mon chere', ju know I luff ju and I could never bear to leef ju. Eet ees jest a leetle partying.. no? Ju just need to reeest, put ju feet up and relax," because, as you may know, all of my internal organs have foreign accents.

"Mr. G.. How am I supposed to become internet famous and make millions of dollars off inbred t-shirts if I'm sitting around with my feet up sipping hot tea all the time? No.. you need to calm down. You're not young anymore and neither am I. I will have you removed if you do not comply," I threatened.

He seemed to settle down after that. I'm still a little feverish, but I'll definitely live for another day or two.

In other news...

Bubbles has reacted to Bossman's little outbursts by turning her Shirley Temple-ness up a few notches.. and octaves. "Cute" and "Helpless" are always her defense mechanisms. She doesn't realize that it just pisses him off even more.

Anywho, I've got piles upon piles of crap to sort through, so I'd better get with the program.

Ya'll have a good one!

Later Taters!

5 comments:

tiff said...

But do your internal organs all have the SAME accent?

The internet needs to know.

Anonymous said...

Mr. G sounds slightly manipulative to me. Hope you get him put in his place and feel better soon!

Jeni said...

Don't mess around with "Mr. G. Bladder!" Evict his butt from the premises before he damages the inner workings -wiring, plumbing, who knows what else -in the place!

kenju said...

Mr. gallbladder can cause some serious sh*t in your body, involving the pancreas, etc. Don't delay!

BetteJo said...

My sister's gallbladder had her in the ICU so be careful, kay?