Bubbles Digs a Hole


Dang ya'll, sorry I didn't come back with the latest and greatest news from the holler yesterday. I got home last night and I broke the internets!! By the time I got it working again, I was too tired to form a coherant thought and gave up.

I'm here this morning to make a mends, pay my dues, make you forget my post slackiness. I have gossip. That's right, juicy fruit for your ears, slanderous statements to make your mouth water, guarnanteed to produce "OOOOOOOs" and "AAAAHHHHHs" from the blogging masses!

Okay, perhaps I exaggerate just a smidge.

Things were pretty quiet here at the Asylum yesterday. My phone rang only once all day with a call from an actual customer. Sales have dried up like a prune, the vultures are circling and aside from worrying that I'm going to be out of a job, the boredom of not having much to do is driving us all stark raving mad.

It's hard to look busy when it's this dead.

So anywho.. Bossman came back to my cubey yesterday afternoon. "Here's what I'm going to do when we go out of business and I can't find another job," he said as he handed me a photo of his latest woodworking project. It was a golf ball display rack thingie. I'm not in to golf, but I do admire fine craftsmanship. I complimented him on his project and speculated that he'd have to set up a stand at the side of the road, selling wooden trinkets to tourists. We had a good giggle, then I showed him my little venture in to e-commerce, Bossman doing a fine job of pretending to be impressed, then moving over to Bubbles cubicle.

He showed her the picture, explaining that it was for displaying golf balls.

Bubbles said, "Wayell... lit me jist ask you a girly question.. is that okay?" I assume that he nodded, I couldn't see what was going on.

"Why would innyone WONT to display golf balls? I mean, WHY would innyone CARE?" Her statement was followed by much loud laughing and ignorant giggling, as she often does when she thinks she's is just SO effin' cute and pleased with herself.

I'm quite certain that my eyes were bulged a full inch out of my head as I did a Daffy Duck double take in her general direction.

As a mother, I have an instinctual urge to protect those who are either too young or too mentally impaired to care for themselves, resulting in my chiming in, trying to do a little verbal damage control on her behalf. I think Bossman and I both explaining to her that a lot of people enjoy this little game called golf and might enjoy displaying a collection, etc. caused her some embarrassment, as if she'd told some great joke that neither of us seemed to get.

"I didn't mean to OFFEND you when I said no one would care about your little project. I honestly don't get why you'd want to display golf balls." (Offend is her favorite word lately. Precious the Elder must have had it on a spelling test this week.)

Bossman's reply?

"That's fine, I understand you don't share my interest in golf. I just won't ever show you anything ever again," he said smiling. He then turned and walked out of her cubicle.

Yeah.. the rest of the day, the tension on this end of the hall was so thick you could smell it.

And on that note, I'm gonna go find something to file.. or something. Don't worry, I promise to take notes if there are anymore outbursts.

This week is almost licked. Ya'll hang in there.

Later Taters.