Bubbles, Babs and Why I'm a Little Nuts

Everyone's all freaked out by the weather reports here in the holler this morning. We're under another winter advisory/watch/warning.... something.... I'm not real worried about it.

Anywho, here's the dirt on the whole Bubbles fiasco, as promised.

First, a Readers Digest Condensed version recap:

Bubbles started working here at the asylum about two weeks after I did, twelve years ago. She was our receptionist for six months before moving to the sales department, where she stayed until she became pregnant with her second child, Precious the Younger. Back then, Bubbles would hide in my office (in accounting) and we'd have long discussions about spirituality, religion and new agey stuff. She could be a little over the top sometimes, but I trusted her and regrettably told her a lot of things about my past that I now wish I hadn't.

Fast forward to about two years ago. I had moved to sales, the manager had quit, they'd hired Bossman to take his place and I was on my second co-worker, Babs. I didn't know what I was doing, I'd had very little training and I was having to figure stuff out as I went along. Rumors had been circulating about how Babs had recently gotten out of the "nervous hospital," having been committed after being found naked in a briar patch at the side of the road, stoned out of her mind.

I only had to work with her a few days to realize it was probably true. She was one wacky chicklet.

Bubbles began calling me a few times a week during this time. All she talked about was how broke they were. She'd been out of work for a while and had tired of babysitting, being stuck at home with a houseful of kids all day. She said she had to get back to work, they didn't have money to pay their bills, Bubbahubby was working two jobs and they were living on "Special Today" hot dogs. I felt so bad for her.

Seemingly out of the blue, our GM started telling me to call Bubbles at home if I had any problems I couldn't sort out. I thought this was odd, she'd not been an employee her for three years. Draw your own conclusions.

Soon, they started having Bubbles come in one day a week to help out. We were super busy and neither me or Babs had a clue what we were doing, so although it was odd, I welcomed the help.

Babs was fired about two weeks later. She hadn't bothered to show up or call one time too many and Bossman couldn't take anymore. He gave her the axe.

Bubbles started the next day.

I was excited at first, but it didn't last long. There was something different about her, something I couldn't quite pin down. I sat in shock as I listened to her talk to customers on the phone like a 1-900 operator. I'm no prude, but it embarrassed the hell out of me the way she went on.

Slowly things started to become more clear. I over heard her telling a customer that she'd been calling the GM for three months before she was rehired, telling him she was ready to come back to work.

And the nasty rumor about Babs, the briar patch and the psychiatric hospital? Louise let it slip that it was Bubbles who had called her with the story as soon as she found out Babs was hired. Bubbles' Bubbahubby was the paramedic on duty the night it happened.

Do you think the hospitial might frown upon his wife telling patient information all over town?

Soon after she came back to work, Bubbles and Bubbahubby paid off their house, bought a 30K camper/trailer/RV thing (which was driven into the side of a barn 24 hours after they got it home.. What comes around... ) and a brand new Jeep Commander.

I can promise ya'll, they weren't suddenly able to afford these things because Bubbles came back to work here.

Does this sound like people who are living in poverty, eating "throw back" meat and scratch and dent mark down cans of tuna?

She's a liar. She'll readily admit she is and laugh about it. She says she "kain't hep it," all while she's smiling and giggling to your face.

When we got our dog, Sammy, it was because Bubbles had called me and said Bubbahubby's partner had one last puppy to get rid of. She told me she had to get it out of there, that he abused the mother dog and left this poor pup locked outside without any shelter. She said she was afraid if she didn't find it a home, he'd drown it. Of course, I told her to bring him to me.

Three years later, I mention something about Bubbahubby's partner being a dog beater. Apparently Bubbles forgot the lies she'd told me before and said that man treated his dog like a baby.

Who knows which story is true?

When she opens her mouth, I have no idea if what's coming out is the truth or a lie. I relay all of this here, because sometimes, when I tell Bubbles stories, I feel like I'm the bad guy, that I'm being unreasonable. I felt like I needed to justify myself.

Maybe I have.. I dunno. I do feel better.

Ya'll have a good one and I'll let ya know if it snows a-hole deep here in the holler overnight.

Later Taters


Anonymous said...

Wow. Manipulative bitch, isn't she? Well at least you know to be careful of her now, but it's too bad you have to. It is true that what goes around comes around.

terri said...

I could not work with someone like that without killing her!

tiff said...

Nice at least to know you need to watch your back at all times. I'm sure she goes to church on Sunday too.


Jeni said...

Like you, I hate being around people who lie - compulsive liars, who don't just tell stories that they embellish but tell stories that they have completely fabricated from start to finish, are the absolute worst! Many, many moons ago, I worked with a young woman (this was late 60's, maybe early 70's) down in D.C. who, as we learned over time dealing with her, was a compulsive liar and it ended up that I let fly on her one day in the office -we both got called into the manager's office for a stern talking to during which I flat out confronted her with some of her lies and thankfully, she ended up quitting, as did another young woman who was just as bad, very manipulative too, who also departed company with our office shortly thereafter too. And so, that story had a happy ending but boy, for several months, it was very wicked, rough sledding dealing with both of them together or even just one at a time. Didn't miss either of them when they left and I have never had the patience then -or since -to deal amicably with people who do that either! What does she have that she uses to hold "heavy, heavy, overhead" on the Bossman there anyway that she can keep on doing the lies, stir up crapola and get others in trouble anyway?

Mahala said...

Let's see.. yes she goes to church on Sunday. She makes a huge deal of wearing a dress to work on Wednesdays and tells everyone it's chuch night, but I hear she rarely actually goes to the midweek service.

The whole thing makes me sad in a way. I always thought the world of her and considered her one of my few friends here. Lulu and I have long wondered if she was always this way and it's just come to light or if something snapped during the time she was home with all those kids.

Law Student Hot Mama said...

The good news is, it doesn't matter what you told her about your past because people are going to know that they can't believe anything that comes out of her mouth . . . so even if she says something true, it'll be like she's calling wolf one too many times.

Tori Lennox said...

Do you think the hospitial might frown upon his wife telling patient information all over town?

OMG!!! I would so be suing her ass off!!!

On the plus side, you know she'll get repaid for her shenanigans someday. Let's hope for sooner rather than later!

gemmak said...

She's either a manipulative bitch or in serious need of some psychiatric care I would guess, either way I can't imagine it's much fun having to tolerate all that crap day in and day out! :o/

newduck said...

Damn. I'm waddling around the house, desperately trying to clean things up for my mom's arrival even though I'm so tired I can barely lift a paper towel, but I had to take a break and check my e-mail. While I was at it, well hell, why not click on a blog? But just one blog because I am seriously running out of time. You guessed it, it was yours. Well worth it, as always.

kenju said...

I agree with law student hot mama. If she tells anything you told her, you could always say it's just another of her lies. No one could tell the difference.

Mahala said...

tori: I know.. Babs could be driving a brand new Jeep Commander lol. Ya know.. Babs' mom still works out in the plant and will walk right over top of me, rather than acknowledge my existance. I wonder what she'd do if she knew who'd spread the rumors?

gem: I tend to think she's a brick shy of a load lol.

newduck: you gotta take it easy girl! And thanks :)

That's what I'm banking on Kenju.

Bah said...

Holy green duck crap, George.

On one hand, I would like to volunteer to kick her pink ass all over NC. On the other, I feel really sorry for her. She sounds like a really sick person, but that give her zero right to manipulate and lie. You have every right to feel betrayed and angry.

On second though, I only want to kick her ass.

Inanna said...

They should bring back gladiators just for her. Bubbles and a black bear in the big arena. People like that gall me.

BetteJo said...

I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt and trust them first - until they burn me and prove they are't to be trusted. Sigh-h. I like being open and get really pissed when somebody burns me and makes me get all cautious about what I say to them and what I don't. Gr-r.

bobbie said...

Sadly, I have a relative like that. Always trying to turn one of us against another. Sometimes I think she's doing it for the sick fun of it. Other times I think she really can't help it and doesn't even know she's lying half the time.
How do you manage to work with someone like that all day? I'd go nuts. I try to avoid my relative.

poopie said...

Lawd girl..I know one just like her here in MY asylum. Maybe they're evil twins separated at birth.

hensteeth said...

I worked with Bubbles' twin sister. And her cousin. Sigh.

Too bad you live in Smallville. Anyplace else, and she'd make up a reason to quit by now. And bring her brand of torment to another place of business.