BLT Abominations

I ordered breakfast from the Grab n' Go (and go and go and go) this morning. They deliver to the Cubicle Asylum and let us run a tab, making it popular among the employees. Besides, the nearest McDonalds is forty minutes away, give or take a few, depending on how many farm vehicles you get behind.

I've not ordered from there in a while, but for two solid weeks it's been low-fat granola bars and fat-free yogurt for breakfast and I just couldn't face one more morning filled with crunchy-nutty goodness.

I needed food dammit.

So I called the Grab n' Go (and go and go and go) and placed an order for a BLT with egg. I'd rather have a yummy biscuit, but they're greasy and tend to accentuate the "go and go and go" effect... if ya know what I mean.

Anywho, there are certain assumptions that one makes when ordering a BLT with egg. One assumes there will be bacon, lettuce and tomato with egg. It's understood that there will also be mayonnaise. I have gotten BLTs from the Grab n' Go (and go and go and go) that had no "L" and I've occasionally received them without "T." I'm usually asked when ordering if I want mayonnaise, which I just assume one would apply to a BLT automatically, otherwise there is nothing to hold it all together. If I were concerned with calories and fat grams, I'd be chowing down on another bar of compressed cardboard granola bar, not eating bacon, so yeah, I expect mayonnaise.

What I do not expect to find on my BLT with egg is cheese. There is no "C" in BLT. To add insult to injury, the cheese was smooshed directly against the mayonnaise.

CHEESE SHOULD NEVER COME INTO CONTACT WITH MAYO!! (unless it is melted cheese and graces the top of a mooburger.)

Gawd.

In other news...

If ya'll take a gander at the end of the right sidebar you'll notice that Google Almighty has graciously allowed me back into the fold. I have a page rank. It's not colossal, but hey, it's not a big fat goose egg either.

I've also added a list of some of the more popular posts here at Hidden Mahala. Originally the list was much longer, but me and Blogger's link list widget had some disagreements and after I took it out back behind the shed for a prayer meeting, I had to start over and do it the old way. I'll be adding more posts to the list in coming days.

Alrighty then. It's Hump Day ya'll. Hump it real good. I'm going to go earn my pittance for the day. Ya'll be good.

Later Taters.

17 comments:

Meritt said...

AHHHHHH How did you get a rank back? Geeze louise... they took mine away and I've not seen since although my readership is higher than ever before.

Mahala said...

Ohhh you're not going to like the solution girl. I removed all traces of PPP, the posts, the links, PPP's little scripts. Then I had to go to Google tools and submit a request for reconsideration, including an explaination of what I've done to fix the site.

Good Luck.

Jeni said...

Well, congrats on getting the page rank back from google. Don't know if I can do all of that since I can barely find my way around with blogger and ppp and such as it is. What a crock though to have to go through all of that with them.

Mahala said...

I'll be glad to help you out over the weekend if you want jeni.

I know it seems like Google was being unfair, but they are the "big boys" and PPP set their system up to depend on Google's PR. All this started when PPP publicly slammed Google's PR system and announced their own.

If I'd been @ Google, I probably would have done the same thing.

All us little fish just got caught in the crossfire.

poopie said...

I eat my BLTs and clubs with no L or T. Just mayo :)

Mahala said...

Hmmm I think that would make it a BM? Dang.. that sounds wrong...

Anonymous said...

Thank god it is Wednesday, no casulties yet. Looking forward to BLTC on TGIF.

DG

BetteJo said...

Something I love from when I was a kid every now and then - velveeta with lettuce on white bread - with MAYO. Okay, Miracle Whip. Yum!

Bah said...

Who doesn't like cheese on their sammiches???? Blasphemy! Sinner!!

Rachel said...

Oh lord...cheese on mayo makes me want to hurl. But nice to know someone else actually likes mayo on sandwiches...round these parts it's all "mustard this, and mustard that" yeck.

terri said...

I'm not opposed to cheese, but I agree it has no place on a BLT. Speaking of BLTs, my kids eat Bs. No L. No T. Just B.

Mahala said...

LOL DG.. Not sure I'll be ordering anymore BLTs this week.

bettejo.. OMG I love Velveeta, but Miracle Whip is nasty lol.

bah: Girl I love me some cheese..just not on a BLT or butt up against mayo.. ain't right.

rachel: I like mustard, but some situations just demand mayo

terri: exactly!

cathy said...

"There is no "C" in BLT."

that just tickled my funnybone!

Patti said...

Mahala, I never heard of a BLT with egg. That certainly would be a new culinary delight to try.

thanks for visiting me!

Mahala said...

Patti: Technically, it's called a BELT.. just in case you ever decide to try one lol.

And you're welcome, I've got you on feed and read your posts regularly :)

Melissa said...

I sometimes have BLTs with mashed avocado instead of mayo, but then I'm a Californian so what do you expect?

Jenny said...

Oh my, what I wouldn't do for a blt right now...even with cheese and mayo smooshed together! Thanks for visiting my blog!