Safety in the Workplace with Monkeys

It's 90° in Frog Pond Holler today. That's hot! And not in a Paris Hilton catch phrase kind of way. It's more like a if-I-go-for-a-walk-I'll-have-sweat-pooling-in-my-butt-dimple kinda way.

I neglected to mention that I had to attend a safety meeting at the asylum the other day. There's nothin' like facing the company break room and it's way-too-tiny-for-my-wide-ass booths before I've even had a chance to get a whole cup of coffee down. The presenter was an EMT-I who apparently thought he was Larry the Cable Guy, bore a strong resemblance to Burl Ives and was about as funny as an amputation. The only thing worse than a boring company sponsored presentation, is one being emceed by someone who thinks they are way funnier than they actually are.

Me and Lulu found seats in the back, which turned out to be the front. As we sat there waiting for it to begin, Lulu found some mystery substance residing on her table. Being the anal retentive cleanliness obsessed woman with a mission that she is, everything had to stop and wait as she went for some napkins and cleaning solution to eliminate the offending liquid/gel mixture.

It was the highlight of the morning.

First we watched a video on bloodborne pathogens and the dangers of HIV and Hepatitis. The company just sent me to a Red Cross course on the same thing a couple of months ago, can you say overkill? After that we watched a very long, very boring slideshow on how to avoid back injuries. The geriatric shipping heifer actually fell asleep. Lulu, Louise and I entertained ourselves for the duration of the presentation snickering at her bobbleheaded slumber.

After viewing one million ways not to lift a box, funnyman decided to show us the "trunk monkey" videos that made their way around the internet a while back. I guess he felt this would add to our awe of his amazing sense of humor. Bubbles thought he was a comic genius and nuyuck nuyucked in a very loud and boisterous manner. As a matter of fact, she went on for the rest of the day about that hilarious monkey. She told everyone she spoke to that day about it, failing to grasp that we'd all been to the same meeting and seen the same videos.

Bless her heart.

Anywho, I'll save ya'll the trouble of Googling The Illustrious Trunk Monkey, enjoy: