A Word on The Weiner Conspiracy

Anthony Weiner can't be real.

This whole stupid, winky texting brouhaha reminds me of one of those conspiracy theory movies, where someone in the government plants someone ridiculously outrageous in the media to draw attention away from something else.

He flashed his bits and his name is WEINER???? CARLOS DANGER????

WAKE UP PEOPLE AND SMELL THE SKUNK WEED!!!

What are they hiding? Why are they redirecting our attention? NO ONE CAN BE THIS CLUELESS!

He's probably an actor, it's the only logical explanation.  I mean.. has anyone seen this guy lately?


That's right. Pauly Shore, star of hits like Bio-Dome and Son-In-Law, aka The Wiesel. Here's a more recent picture:


And now.. Anthony Weiner:


I rest my case America. You are welcome.