Curing Carpet Herpes and Other Provocative Subjects

There was a hard frost covering the holler this morning. The yard is crunchy, the puddles are frozen and it's colder than penguin snot.

It's been AGES since I've posted and I've got so many things to tell ya'll, each topic really deserving a post of it's own, but if I did that, we'd never get caught up. So get comfy, go pee if you gotta, fix yourself a cup o' joe and prepare thyself.

We'll start with the critters. Sammy, the Boston Baked Beagle woke up the other morning with one ear swelled up like it had been inflated. And it was his good ear. The Amazon took him to the vet, who called it a hematoma, which I'm pretty sure is the same thing we used to call a "pump knot." They've delayed surgery until we get his funky skin condition back under control, so he's back on the antibiotics and steroids. In a few days he'll be stomping around the house like Ahhnold demanding his kibble.

Ayla (The Great Huskinese or Pyrusky, if you prefer) and I have been taking long walks (almost) every night after work. During this time I've decided that Caesar Milan is full of shinola, it doesn't matter if my dog wants to walk in front of me (both our ample booties don't really fit side by side on the sidewalk anyway) as long as she's not pulling me and I don't need to be an asshole to my dog to teach her how to walk correctly on a leash.

We are both much happier this way. She walks along, wagging her tail, sniffing the ground and greeting dogs, humans and chickens along the way. If you're doing what the "experts" tell you to do, but your gut tells you it's not right, follow your gut. Check out this guy for a different perspective.

Kitty Kitty Two by Four is less evil than she used to be and even demands the occasional loving cuddles. It's a miracle, although she still gets pleasure from holding on to Ayla's tail while she's dragged through the house and giving Yoda the occasional smack on the head.

Yoda is the same bossy little old man who acts like he's terminally starved for attention.

Lola the Bunny is completely housebroken and has the run of the RV when I'm home. She'll now hop up on the couch and sit beside you for head scritches and can smell a banana from the other end of the caravan. She's still really too young to get much fruit, but I give her a bite from time to time. Her favorite thing is parsley and she'll be your best friend FOREVER if you give her a handful. Other than trying to steal whatever I'm working on (I think she has clepto tendencies) she pretty much just chills, with the occasional running/hopping/sliding on wood floors fit.

Speaking of the girl cave, most of ya'll will remember the bad case of carpet herpes (check it out here if you missed it.) It's currently covered with a bedspread, I wanted to get some more carpet eventually, but sheesh, who's got time? Anywho, I found some fabric paint online, made for upholstery, that can be used on carpet.

HOLY CRAPBALLS BATMAN!!!

I actually got a little girly moist with excitement when I realized I could PAINT THE HERPES CARPET. (And yes, I do realize I've been manless for just a wee bit too long.) It's $20 a can, but I don't have much area to cover. I can use it on the clusterfucked front step area too.

You know you're intrigued. Admit it.

I've been thinking about moving Lola's area to the shower. It's not big enough to use for much else, other than maybe to bury corpses in an upright position. And then there's that no running water thing. It's currently where I put my dirty laundry, which can be moved to the bathroom, which I don't use because asshole Cousin H never hooked up the sewer thingie AND there's no heat in there anyway. If I moved her, I'd put her crate inside the shower, remove the door, which would let more light in from the skylight, then put a pet gate on this end of the kitchen. She'd have way more room to run around when I'm not here (the whole kitchen, hallway area,) she'd still have complete run of the place when I'm home and she wouldn't be attacking my toes when I try to run the sewing machine.

She's not a fan of my fancy shmancy new Brother. It was the cheapest one they had at Wallyworld, but I still think it's awesometastic.

I finally finished the pillows for the plant manager yesterday. They're just plain-jane muslin pillows with brown covers, but I'm still happy with how they turned out. It was great practice with the new machine. Now I've got time to make more earrings. Supplies arrived from Turkey last week, but between Ma, Sammy, Bossholio being out for the past week and six pillows, I've not even had time to open them.

Ma has been riding the crazy train pretty hard lately. That's all I'm going to say on the subject, other than I never thought I'd see the day when I had to threaten my own mother to get her to put on some damn pants.

Oh yeah. And I've discovered Pinterest. That's like.. a few hundred more hours of my life in front of the computer. You can follow me here if you'd like.

Anywho...

Everything is a mess. Dishes, fabric scraps, bunny hay, blankets tossed around, sewing supplies spread out on the bed. I'd better get to it. We'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!!