I'm Taking My Act on the Road

Bossholio is gone all this week, meaning I'm running around like a cat with it's tail on fire, playing catch up but never actually accomplishing any damn thing.

Taking a break to catch ya'll up on the latest news in and around the holler can't hurt. I can't get any behinder.

Ma's been moved from the nut hut to the nursing home for some physical therapy. She didn't want to go at first, there were phone calls from doctors, I called Ma and she hung up on me. All this took place during my lunch break last Friday. Eventually they sent in a hostage negotiator the social worker from the nursing home who convinced her to go.

It's a decent place, unlike the nightmarish hell hole they have here in Hee-Haw county. There's a beauty parlor on site, they have a manicurist come in twice a week, pets can come visit, there's all kindsa food and activities. They even have a guitarist come in to play during the morning coffee social twice a week. Hell, it's like summer camp.

I'm ready for the home. It doesn't seem like a bad deal at all.

Ma has a roommate, Dorothy, who can't hear unless you put your face right by hers and scream, so conversations with her are fun. At least Ma can sit there and babble about residents shooting their pet possums in the middle of the night and Dorothy can just smile and nod and thank the powers that be for the gift of silence.

Meanwhile, back at the trailer...

Saturday was Pupzilla's first birthday. I'd hoped to have new pictures, but between running to Big City, working on Ma's room and The Asylum, I've not had much time to do anything. If I sit still too long I fall right to sleep.

I'm more fun than a barrel of monkeys.

I finally got that package of jewelry supplies from Istanbul. I'm hopeful I'll get a chance to work on them some this weekend.

In addition to everything else, my FMF is doing the nasty on me lately. This time it's attacking my toes and my thumbs. I get home at night, take my shoes off, put my feet up and watch in amazement as my toes turn into pudgy little divining rods, doing their own little dance, pointing in every direction.

Seriously. It's like they're possessed.

Sometimes one will curl up and shoot off to the left, all on it's own.

You can't get entertainment like this just anywhere. I'm available for parties and fundraisers. Email me for pricing information.


I should get back to work. Ya'll have a good one. We'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!



kenju said...

I don't have to email you - I already know you are priceless!!!

BetteJo said...

Sounds like the nursing home my mom was in. There really are some places you wouldn't mind having your parent in, with all the horror stories you wouldn't think you can trust anyone. She'll do fine there, try not to worry. My mom got very fond of the food!

tiff said...

FMF = FML? Sounds like it, a little.

Glad to know your Ma is getting good care, and that YOU are getting a little rest.

croneandbearit said...

thank you for making my nutcase life look oh so boring by comparison - I knew I could count on you ;)

Significant Snail said...

Where are you and when are you coming back????

Significant Snail said...

Where are you and when are you coming back????

tiff said...

so, where ya been?