And In a Flash it Was Gone

Where the crap did my weekend go?

My brain is all cornfuzzled at the moment, for various reasons, so instead of pretending to have the mental stamina to compose complete sentences into anything closely resembling a paragraph, I give you my list of things I learned this weekend:

• When your plumbing borked all to hell, it doesn't matter how many times you clean the affected areas, your house will stink. The six piles of dirtly laundry distributed throughout the house contribute to the aroma. I feel like the greasy people who lived in the trailer park down the road from us when I was shacking up with the ex-con.
• If your sweet, little fuzzball of a puppy starts stealing entire LOGS from the fireplace hearth at 10 weeks old, it's a pretty good indication that she's going to be strong enough to kick your ass.
• Trying to give the puppy a good brush out of her crazy thick coat, so your bed doesn't smell like yard dirt when you get up in the morning (I don't let her sleep on the bed, she just DOES,) is sorta like trying to groom an eight legged drunken grizzly bear.
• When the weather gurus are calling for a major snowstorm and you've got a drawer full of extra batteries and a porch covered with emergency firewood, it's probably going to snow everywhere but the holler.
• An Amazon child with a newly acquired vehicle will be itching to drive it somewhere.. anywhere.. to the point of volunteering to go grocery shopping. As Martha would say.. it's a good thing.
• You never fully appreciate the awesomeness of a good nap until you hit 40.
• When you realize your new pup was born on Friday the 13th, you shouldn't be surprised that your Scary Hillbilly Town vet doesn't do free shelter pup checkups or accept the insurance you got free for thirty days with the adoption. Yay.

It's chaos at the Asylum this morning, with stubborn programmers, sick family members and end-of-month accounting breakdowns.

I think I'm gonna crawl under my desk and hide.

Ya'll have a good one, we'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!