Bubbles Returns.. Briefly

It's cold and nipply in Frog Pond Holler today, but at least it's not snowing. It's supposed to be warming up a little, but we've still got some snowy patches on the ground and the creek remains half frozen. I guess the weather gurus have a different definition of warm than I do.

Here at the Asylum, we got the news Wednesday that Bossman will no longer be required to take a week furlough every month and I'm back on a forty hour schedule. Ya'll have NO idea how glad I am that I won't have to fly solo as sales ninja anymore. Granted, Bossman doesn't exactly have magic fairy dust and unicorns shooting out of his butt, but he has been easier to get along with and his being here takes the pressure off me.

And getting a whole paycheck for a change doesn't suck either.

The same day they called Bossman back to the office, I thought I spotted another familiar face sneaking in the front door, striking fear in my heart. The cloaked figure moved stealthily from the front door to Tiny's office, clutching a manila envelope to their chest. Thelma volunteered to sneak up to the front office on an information gathering mission, returning to confirm my fears.

It was Bubbles.

Now, I know some of ya'll probably have mixed emotions about Bubbles returning to the Asylum. I have to admit, the old blog just hasn't been the same without her coochie crud, dildo phone and lengthy sex ed discussions with Louise, but I've made too much progress since she's been gone. If she came back as my co-worker, they'd have to up my medication.

There was speculation as to why in the heck Bubbalicious was up here. Of course, I was scared plumb pootless that she'd been called back in to talk about coming back to work, but she hadn't spoken to Bossman and the GM completely ignored the fact that she was here at all.

Obviously we needed more information. We sent Lulu, who marched right in there with a big ol "Hey!" and came right out and asked Bubbles what she was doing up here.

I love Lulu.

It seems that Bubbles, who's been laid off for a year now and who's been telling everyone in town that she was going to get a job up at the elementary school, was kindly informed by her Bubbahubby that it was time to stop pussyfootin' around and find herself gainful employment. Bubbles, acting like the delicate, unworldly little hausfrau that she wants everyone to think she is, called Tiny, our plant manager and a.k.a. Bubbles' work hubby, telling him that Bubbahubby was upset with her and she needed Tiny's help because she didn't know how to create a resume.

Seriously.. what kinda person has the balls to go to the company that kicked them to the curb a year ago to ask them to spend two hours of company time on her resume?

Lord.. please let that child find herself a job so she'll stop sniffing around here like an old hound.


In other news, Ma claims she heard something outside her window the other night, looked out and found a big doe looking back at her and all up in her bedroom. She said they had a nice little talk and it's come back to visit a couple of times since.

Great. Between the possums, stray cats, screech owls and now deer, I could probably open my own petting zoo.

Ah well.. I suppose I should get back to the grind. Before I go, I wanted to thank ya'll for your response to yesterday's "De-Lurking" day. It was great to see some names I've not seen in a while and a few I didn't even know were out there. Just for the record, I am the world's worst for lurking. I read everything on a feedreader to make it easier to do from work without opening too many windows, so I'm cool if you wanna lurk in the shadows.

Lurk on!

We'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!


Wildhair said...

I kind of miss the tales about the dildo-phone/coochie crud queen, but not at the expense of your sanity.

kenju said...

What Wildhair said!

I could start a petting zoo too.

BetteJo said...

This is not a comment. I am lurking today.

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