Saturday, August 22, 2009

And Then It Was Just Time...

So.. Thursday I came home at lunch and found Ozzy hadn't moved since I'd left that morning. I got down in the floor and talked to him, he wasn't interested in getting up. The Amazon came over and scratched behind his ear, then recoiled in horror as he went in to a seizure.

I hoped it was a one time thing. He had seemed to be doing so much better. His leg was healing, he was getting friskier every day. Just the night before he'd been in the kitchen, trying to steal leftovers off the stove. I told the Amazon to call the vet, see if maybe it was a reaction to the new pain medication. I went back to work, but she called me about an hour later, crying and telling me he'd just had another seizure.

I totally lost control of my emotions at work. I told Bossman, he put his arm around me and told me to just go and not worry about it. If I hadn't been so upset, I probably would have fainted from shock.

Ozzy wouldn't get up, he couldn't move much at all. We lifted him with the sheets he'd been laying on and carried him to the truck, stopping about four times on the way when I started to lose my grip. Somewhere in the process I pulled something in my back.

After chest x-rays and blood tests, we decided it was time to stop trying. Sometime overnight he'd crashed, turned a corner and started towards the point of no return. Every vet in the practice who'd taken part in his care over the past month or so, came in to say goodbye and to tell us we'd done a good job with him. They let us pet him and talk to him as they put him down.

We decided to have him cremated, I couldn't bear thoughts of the Scary Hillbilly Town city dump and the Amazon, as we made the decision of what to do, looked at me and said, "Mama, that's a big hole to dig."

Now there's a big new dog lot in the back yard that Ozzy never saw and a bright, shiny new dog house, with windows, that he never got to try. They'll stay there until the time is right. They won't stay empty forever.

I slept in my own bed for the first time in forever Thursday night, but I had to leave the t.v. on. And even though Sammy had his butt scootched up against my back, I still caught myself reaching down to pat Ozzy's back in the middle of the night.

Right now, it's hard, but me and the Amazon know we did what we could. It was just time. Now if ya'll will excuse me, I'm gonna go hug the stuffins out of a certain Boston Baked Beagle.

Ya'll have a good one.



Later Taters.

24 comments:

TopSurf said...

So sorry for your loss. Sending you a ton of hugs.

bronsont said...

I know how much this can hurt, I cry with you.

Unknown said...

I read this and started to cry. Simon, my "blue-eyed terrorist", came over and let me pet him. Lexxy the Dog didn't notice, but they're both just like children...only less annoying.

Ozzy will always be your baby. You did everything you possibly could for him, and he knew it. I'm sure he'd want you to find another baby to love...eventually. I hope, when the time is right, that it'll be a "pound puppy". Both of ours are rescues and they're such a joy..MOST of the time :)

I know how much it hurts. I still look at Slim's grave, with the big rosemary plant on it, and want to cry. But it was his time, too.

Many, many hugs for you and the other "family members".

Anonymous said...

So sorry. It's always hard to loose a family member. I'll be thinking about you and the Amazon.

Robbie

Cylithria said...

sorry for your loss. my thoughts are with ya'll right now

Jessica said...

So sorry, Mahala.

Tori Lennox said...

Hugs to you and the Amazon. I'm so sorry.

BetteJo said...

That sucks, Mahala. It just so sucks. It's nice though that he was feeling like the extra special pampered pooch before his time came, and you were spending lots of time doting on him. Good for you and the Amazon, AND him.
(((HUGS)))

Lisa said...

Ohhh.... so sad! Big hugs. :(

tiff said...

Big sigh....

My condolences on Ozzy's passing. So glad to hear 'his' new digs won't stay empty forever.

Carolyn said...

:( so sorry for your loss. We are within days of the same thing for our oldest dog. I know it isn't an easy decision.

Blanche said...

Hugs dolphie. Remember, all dogs go to heaven. May the Oz man rest in peace.

Jeni said...

This brought back memories from 46 years ago this past June when the dog I'd had for a mere five years had seizures and died. He was the bestest mutt ever and all these years later, several dogs in between, he still the one I miss the most. I know there are folks who think those of us who are this attached to our dogs, cats, whatever pet it might be are a bit "touched in the head" to react this way to the death of an animal but they are definitely family, aren't they? My sympathy to you and the Amazon.

Frank said...

Most dogs seem to have an individual personality and Ozzy certainly did. When one comes to know the personality behind the wagging tail, the painful loss is truly the loss of a family member. You did way more than any dog could reasonably hope for and I'm sure Ozzy knew he was an important member of his pack,

kenju said...

I was about to cry from reading about him, and then I saw the photo and I just lost it. Poor Ozzy and family. I am so sorry and I know how sad you are.

Kranky Granny said...

This same situation has played out several times in my house and I know how hard it can be. You have my sympathy. But, I believe that death for our beloved pets (like humans) is not final. There is a doggy heaven.

Anonymous said...

They are members of our familys, they are are friends and they love us unconditionally. They improve the quality of our lives more than non pet people can imagine. I am so sorry for your loss and I know your grief. You are not alone in your sadness.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

I'm very sorry for your loss. You did do everything you could for him. When I've had pets pass away, I think, "I'm so grateful for the years I had with them. My life is richer for those shared years." I hope that is a comforting thought for you as well. {{{Hugs}}}

Unknown said...

I am so sorry! Although it is painful for us, sometimes letting them go is the most compassionate and loving thing we can do for our beloved pets. You took good care of him, and he loved you for it.

Traci Dolan said...

I'm so sorry Mahala. Got big tears a rollin'. I definitely know how that feels. Hugs.

smiss00.artfire.com said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Ozzy seems to have been such a sweetie, and I also mourn that I never really knew him. I know exactly what you mean about going to pet him when you were trying to go to sleep.

Much love.

smiss00.artfire.com said...

also, that photo speaks volumes. :*

Significant Snail said...

Oh! RIP Ozzy!!

Idgie @ the "Dew" said...

Hon,

I put down two dogs a year ago after nursing them thru old age and organ failure.

I kept praying they would die in their sleep so I didn't have to do anything.

It wasn't easy and the kids looked at me like I was evil. But I like to think the dogs went on to a better place where they didn't have to wonder if they could walk to go outside or make it to the water bowl.......

You got my love and thoughts.

Idg