Wednesday, April 29, 2009

When Nature Kicks Your Butt

It's Wednesday night in Frog Pond Holler (does that make it Hump Night?) the sink is full of dirty dishes, rain is gently falling on the metal trailer roof and the garbage needs to be taken out.

It'll still be there tomorrow.

Day one of Operation Green Thumb thoroughly kicked my bootay. I wallered dirt, rocks and worms all over the future garden yesterday and if everything continues at the current pace, I should be able to get it all planted by oh... May 2011. I have bug bites in places I don't care to disclose. I've developed a brand new set of aches and pains.. oh yeah.. and managed to get a nice, mater red sunburn, just on my nose.

Ooooh I'm just oozin' sexay now.

The sad part? I spent all that time trying to move massive chunks of turf, only finishing three-fourths of a row, to find out today that they weren't done with the tilling of the ground and what I was trying to do by hand (and damn near killing myself in the process) they'd be coming back to finish with a spiffy piece of machinery.

I may or may not have actually fallen to my knees, screaming praise to a Supreme Being at the news that I wouldn't have to get elbow deep in the worms, spiders and gawd knows what else again any time soon.

Moving on...

We're getting busy at the Asylum (knock on wood) and I've been working over my allowed 30 hours, but only in half hour bits here and there. When given the choice between learning to do part of my job or paying me for a little more, Bossman opted to talk to the GM about my hours. Tomorrow is the last day of the month and April will be the best booking month we've had so far this year.

Dare I say that things are looking up?

Anywho...

Practical Magic is on the boob tube, so I think I'll go back to the couch, slap on a little more Ben Gay and pour me a nice cold glass of something. But before I go...

Heard 'Round the Trailer:

After our gardening adventure, I looked over at the Amazon sitting beside me, slouched down on the couch, dirt on her face, grass in her hair, a warm red glow on her normally ivory skin and I watched as she reached down between her feet, picking up a green 2-liter bottle and taking a big swig from it. I shook my head and I said, "Oh my gawd, when did you get so damned redneck?"

She glanced at me from the corner of her eye, sneering, then took another swig and let out the loudest, most disgusting belch I've ever heard come from the mouth of such a delicate, well educated creature.

Then she grinned and said, "An you know wut Maw? I'm gonna live with you fer the rist of my life."

Give me strength.

Ya'll have a good one. We'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!

3 comments:

kenju said...

An' that's a real good comfort, ain't it Maw?

Dianne said...

make sure you keep as much of what you do as possible a secret, a big dark secret girl!

amazon makes me laugh

tiff said...

That Amazon is a keeper.