Pooh Bear, Fainting Ladies and Dancing to the Oldies

I'll bet ya'll thought I'd fallen off the face of the earth or something. Not to worry, I'm here with bells on my toes, ready for kickin' booty and takin' names.

Let's catch up on everything, kay?

First off, I'd like someone to explain to me why I thought it was a good idea to go grocery shopping, at Wal-Mart, on Super Bowl Sunday, before the game? Holy bovine Batman... there were entirely too many people up in that store... with children of the screaming variety on every aisle making sure their voices were heard.

By the time I got to the Cheerios, I was already fantasizing about beating people in the head with my ginormous Pooh Bear coupon binder.

One little old lady, obviously overwhelmed by the "falling prices" smiley faces, passed out on the bench by the cashier line. It was craziness.

We made it out alive though, thankfully, although I had my doubts there a time or two.

Here at the Asylum, I've been super busy and loving it. There's no popping gum, no crotch rot discussions and the dildo phone sits silently on Bubbles' old desk. I work away without interruption, listening to an oldies station while I shuffle papers and sweet talk French Canadians into buying our product.

It gets interesting ya'll. I don't speak French and they don't speak hillbilly.


We'll get catch up more later. For now.. I've got a meeting to grace with my smiling face. Ya'll have a good one.

Later Taters!

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