Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Boots, Ball Gags and Boobs

It's warm and muggy here in the holler this morning. I'm back at the Cubicle Asylum after my fun filled three day weekend.

Gee it's good to be back. I've been at my desk for an hour and sixteen minutes and Bubbles has already caused my mind to drift to violent fantasies involving blunt objects and ball gags.

Ya'll can feel free to fill in the details on your own.

Remember my trashy, big-boobed, cousin with the lazy eye's youngin? She showed up yesterday, hindering most of my plans of domestic accomplishment. She and Ma pestered the living crap out of me all morning, a situation compounded by the excitement of a huge drug raid taking place on the police scanner and the appearance of three of Frog Pond Holler's finest in front of the trailer, sticking their heads down a man hole.

No lie. We have to find our entertainment where we can:


072808 001


If you look closely at the edge of the road, you'll find the boot they retrieved from the hole.

No seriously. A boot.

Moving on...

I never did get Ma's mattress turned or work on those new designs. I cooked dinner, washed a bunch of dishes, laundry and scrubbed the bathroom.

I know how to live it up don't I?

Anywho, Bossman is leaving in about an hour, so I'd better get caught up before his phone calls start ringing back here.

Ya'll have a good one!

Later Taters!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

So.... the youngin? She just comes over to hang out with your mom? And watch you clean? Isn't the youngin in or near her teens? Or am I remembering that wrong and maybe this is your BB cousin's way of snagging some freebie babysitting?

Mahala said...

The youngin is like.. 10? I think. Ma kept her for weeks at a time when she was a baby, before Ma's health got worse. She's more of a gramma to her than her actual grandmother. The youngin's mom sends her to stay with her grandmother (my Aunt Moses) in the summer, then Aunt Moses brings her to our house to stay while she's out mowing for $$$. I gripe, but honestly, it's the only time Ma acts halfway happy.

poopie said...

Wow..your life is almost as exciting as mine!

kenju said...

A boot? Was it clogging up the sewer? Otherwise, how would they know it was there? That IS exciting.....LOL

Jeni said...

So true about those of us who reside in the boondocks - take your fun wherever you can get it! If you read my post from earlier today about the couple who flipped a car over and my son, son-in-law and daughter helped them out, come to find out in last night's paper, she was just sentenced last week on 2 counts of bad checks -2 days in jail and probation of "no drug/alcohol usage" but apparently that aspect of probation hadn't registered because they had just left one of the local bars after having had 3 beers -or so she told her mother on the phone! That, plus she was in another accident in the past 2 months where she was charged with not having insurance on the vehicle (a very big no-no in PA and some other moving violation type charges. Slow learners, I'd say!
But with your Mother, if it brings her some pleasure to have the cousin and the child around, guess you have to do what you have to do there then, don't 'cha?

Significant Snail said...

Glad to hear you're all safe from that wayward boot! I am a little concerned with your knowledge of ball gags....not that I would know what that is...LOL

Anonymous said...

Well, that's a good thing for your Ma then. Whatever brings a little peace for a while's gotta be a good thing.