I Think I Need My Head Examined



I had one of my weirdo dreams last night, so get out your dream interpretation books and follow along.

Do ya'll remember the television show "Family Affair" from the sixties? With Buffy, Jody, Mr. French and Mrs. Beasley? Okay, well none of those people were in the dream, but the dad was. It began with a gathering of moms in the yard, outside of my cousin's house back home in Virginia. They had all just returned from going with their kids on a field trip to the zoo. They were all standing around, drinking coffee out of paper cups, smoking cigarettes and discussing the trip. I have no idea where the kids were. Maybe we left them at the zoo or fed them to the lions or something... who knows.

So then, the teacher leaves on foot and we follow her. We walk into this two story brick building, with glass doors. Outside, in front of the doors was a place to tie horses. Okay, yes I know this isn't making any sense, but it was a dream. We all go inside and for some reason, one of the ladies' flip-flop type sandals keep getting my attention. Inside, we sit in a little cafe' type area for coffee, which seemed redundant because they'd all be drinking coffee through the whole thing. Then the teacher motions for me to follow her and we walk around a corner and down a short hall way to room in the back. There are tables and chairs set up with crotchedy old men talking about something I didn't understand. We walk up to a window and there, behind the sliding glass, is the dad from Family Affair, who we then bought lottery tickets from.


I'm not sure what happened after that, the next thing I can remember is being alone and retracing my steps. I went back into the brick building, not sure if it was the right one or not and found the woman's sandals on the floor by the booth we'd been sitting in. Then I started down the hallway and ran into Lorne Greene sitting at a table. He invited me to sit down and asked me what I was doing there. He kept looking at me very suspiciously, as if he doubted I'd ever been there before. I tried to explain what had happened earlier, but he kept eyeing the flip flops, which I was now wearing and questioning me. He refused to let me past, all the while smiling and being very gentlemanly yet condescending, a very smooth talker. He eventually convinced me to leave, which I did, but not before taking a quick peek through the doorway behind him. The room was still full of crotchedly old men. I think it was a backroom gambling den.

Now, it's important to mention that I've not seen nor had the least bit of fleeting thought of that old television show in probably twenty years. I have no idea why I'd dream of someone from the cast. As for Lorne Greene being a bookie or a mobster, I don't get that one either. I will admit that I've been shopping for some sandals to kick around in, which may explain the flip flops. After work Friday, I ran into Louise at the dollar store, she'd taken the day off to go with her kids on a field trip to Santa's Land, which has a petting zoo. That might explain the beginning of it.

But Lorne Greene?