Hit the Road Jack

Thank goodness that week is over. I'm off until Monday, but tomorrow can't really count as a day of relaxation. I'm heading to G'boro to meet the Amazon, then she's moving out of her dorm for the last time and coming home.

I'm a tad bit worried about the driver's side door on the van. I'm gonna ask those of you who partake of a little daily conversation with a Higher Power to please say a prayer that I don't reach in the floor to rescue my cellphone after it goes flying off the passenger seat, swerving slightly and causing my sizable hind end to push upon the driver's side door resulting in it popping open, then as I reach out to try to catch the door, my hind end sliding a bit to the left, leaving me to grip on for dear life with only one hiney cheek to depend on, teetering dangerously on the brink of death, only to lose my balance anyway and go flying out the door onto the interstate, rolling into the path of the VERY same eighteen wheeler I gave the one fingered California howdy to on the way down to G'boro last time, who will, of course, recognize the hippy van and see this as an opportunity to get his revenge, knocking my now limp and lifeless body to the emergency stopping lane with the front of his truck, where I'll be discovered in the wee hours of the morning by a reformed alcoholic state trooper who'll have to stifle a giggle as he notices the giant P-E-T-E-R-B-I-L-T burned into my butt cheeks, which were left naked as my clothing was scraped from my body, being drug across the asphalt by the fore mentioned truck.

If ya'll could find it in your heart, I'd appreciate it.

After tomorrow, there'll only be one more trip before I'm finished, the Amazon's graduation ceremony will be next Friday. After that.. no more trips to G'boro.

Thank the Lord.

For now though, I'm pooped. I may take a small power nap until Craig Ferguson comes on.



kenju said...

Peterbuilt, huh? I'd like to see that....LOL

Anonymous said...

Oh my. Only you could make such a tragic possible situation so hysterically funny that I now have to clean spewed coffee off my desk.

Have a good trip - and if that cell phone drops - leave it be!


AC said...

Congratulations to the Amazon and her good mother. But you e careful, ya hear, on that drive. I need may regular dose of Frog Pond Holler antics as only you can provide.

I have lost the ability to sleep again so am getting a regular experience of The Craig. I see your point.

Travel said...

Thank you for more brilliant writing. Blessings have been demanded from the higway safety gods, what would we do without you!


AC said...

I'm tagging you with the ABC's meme and hope you'll come out and play. You don't have anything else on your plate do you????

poopie said...

Prayers sent up as I type ^j^