Sunday, August 27, 2006

The Emmys, Porcupines and Craig Ferguson

First, I wanted to thank ya'll for all your encouragement following my last post. I promise to finish the story in the next day or two, it's been kicking around in my head for a couple of weeks. I have to admit, that I'm a thousand times more apprehensive about doing that, than I am about sharing the personal things that go on in my life. And now, for what's really important at the moment.....

The Emmys

Normally, I wouldn't have been watching the awards, I've never seen most of the shows that were nominated. But this year I watched because.... prepare for the collective eyeroll... Craig Ferguson was nominated for an Emmy. So there I was, curled up on the couch with a Diet Pepsi, one pushy Boston Baked Beagle trying to scoot me into the floor, one tailess cat perched on the back, almost on my head and one very irritated Ma peeping out of her room every few minutes asking if I'd started fixing dinner yet. I pride myself in my multi-tasking abilities, but there were red carpet arrival shows on two different networks, I had to man the remote, switching back and forth between channels... just in case. Occasionally, I'd luck out and both networks would go to commercial at the same time and it was safe to sprint into the kitchen and toss something on the stove. It's not that far from the couch to the kitchen.. trailer livin' ya know.. the stove is just like.. right over there.

As I watched Joan and Melissa doing their thing and the other people on NBC, noticing all of the beautiful dresses and tuxes, I found myself wondering why some of these men didn't SHAVE. We're not talking five o'clock shadow here, or even those with a little bit of beard going on. I'm talking about this prickly, porcupine ... thing. Just.. EEWW!! I know their mamas taught them better than that!!

After that, instead of just hoping Craig Ferguson would win, I found myself worrying that he'd show up looking all prickly. Since we're on the subject, any of you men out there reading this, just know that the porcupine look can leave a NASTY rash on assorted sensitive female bits if and when it should come into contact with those areas.

Don't ask me how I know. Just take my word for it, alrighty?

Eventually, the show began and I could safely finish cooking dinner so Ma would stop acting like a starving Ethiopian. Personally, I would have been just fine with a mater sandwich (that's tomato for those of you of the Northern persuasion.)

I was amazed to see Dick Clark on stage. It was difficult to see him, when he's been out of the public eye for so long. He made me a little weepy.

Barry Manilow performing "Bandstand," sounded the same as he did twenty years ago, when my best friend and I would sit in her bedroom after a night at the skating rink, listening to his albums over and over, along with Aerosmith. My friend had crushes on both Barry and Steven Tyler at the same time. Back then, I didn't see anything really unusual about that. Now, it seems kinda...wrong. I'll refrain from commenting on Mr. Manilow's *cough* youthful appearance.

Eventually, the catagory for which Craig Ferguson was nominated was announced. I'm still trying to figure out how he, Letterman, Colbert and Manilow ended up in the same category. It reminds me of that Sesame Street song, "One of these things is not like the other, one of these things does not belong."

Just be thankful you can't hear me singing it in my Cookie Monster voice.

I was disappointed when he lost to Barry Manilow, but after they had the poor feller performing a tribute to Dick Clark after postponing his hip surgery for the ceremony, hell they had to give him something I guess.

Craig also presented an award, so the night wasn't a total loss for me. Have I mentioned that he is one fine looking hunk o' man?

Dang.

Oh and thank God he wasn't sportin' that porcupine look. Not that he would, but I was starting to worry.

The awards weren't even off the air yet before some of my loyal readers began sending me emails with pictures of the red carpet arrival of Mr. Ferguson and his date, who was lovely and quite stunning in her blue gown.

It's way past my bedtime now, so I'm going to run, before I turn into a pumpkin.

Later Taters.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you got to see your man. :)

Loner said...

I thought of you when they showed his cute face during that part of the awards - knew you were watching!

Mahala said...

tori: me too!

loner: Yes ma'am I was :)