I'll just jump right in with the latest news of all things Mahala.
As of September 1st, my monthly income has been $0, unless you count the $196 a month I get in food stamps. My health comes and goes. I might be a cleaning machine for a week, then lying around pissing and moaning for the next two. Not being able to keep myself in meds has made it somewhat worse, but that's how it is with no money, no insurance.
On the advice of Aunt Moses, Kat from The Asylum, Ma and T.A., I applied for disability. I have been diagnosed with 6 different ailments that are on the SSD list. Everything I read says it takes 3 months to find out if you're approved (the first round anyway,) so maybe I'll hear something soon.
In the meantime I've gone from Miss Independent, to having to ask T.A. to buy everything for me, on top of her paying all the bills on her own.
My sleep is all jacked up. Sometimes I go for three or four days of four hour sleep/awake rotation, losing track of what day it is all together. Yesterday I woke up at noon, then stayed awake for 25 hours straight, eventually falling asleep, sitting straight up on the couch this afternoon. I don't know if it's due to a lack of drugs, depression, anxiety or some new fucked up ailment.
I rarely leave the house. I will occasionally venture outside to witness the daylight, but I usually sleep through most of it. Since the brakes went out on the truck, I can't even get out and cruise around when I feel antsy.
My phone was cut off over a month ago. I don't have any way to check on Ma. This fact, combined with the lack of anxiety meds, fuels the most fucked up nightmares you can imagine.
When things get really rough, I go sit in the bathroom floor and feed cucumbers to the guinea pigs. There's something about their tiny little mouths and round booties that make me forget everything else. Geriatric mutt Sammy stays glued to my side most of the day and Ayla makes me feel safe at night.
Nothing is coming in here on me with my scary looking hellhound charging after them.
It's not all bad. Using a series of private Roku channel apps and one shady website, I watch more t.v. for free than I ever paid for before. My weekly doses of zombie killing and cowboy robots are therapeutic.
Anywho, I guess I just wanted to check in and tell ya'll Happy Turkey Day. I'm not going to promise to check in more, because it seems that any proclamation made of promised future accomplishments seems to guarantee it won't happen.
Ya'll take care. We'll talk again. Sometime.