In Survivor Mode

Hey ya'll. It's official. I survived my first week of unemployment.

It's been weird. The only times I've been without a job were for a couple of years after TA was born and the first couple of months after we moved to the holler. I literally do not know what to do with myself.

Anxiety was a big issue last week, but that seems to have subsided. However, knowing myself as I do, I've spent a considerable amount of time on the phone with various mental health professionals, trying to get an appointment. The only provider in Hee Haw County doesn't take my insurance and would charge me $90 for an evaluation and $60 for a 30 minute session. If I wait until my insurance ends on March 31st, I can go and pay a $3 copay.

What kind of effin sense does that make?

I did speak with a lady at length yesterday in Big City who said she could get me in a program at the hospital for intensive outpatient therapy, who does take my insurance, but I'd have to be there by 9am  and stay 'til noon five days a week. Hell, by the time I drive to Big City everyday for two weeks, I'll have used up all my funds.

The lesson? Don't go crazy in Hee Haw county.

I did manage to get an appointment with the Hee Haw Clinic on the 30th. At least I can get my prescriptions filled while I still have coverage. I'm going to look in to BC/BS of NC, once I find out if/what my unemployment will be. They offer a discount based on your adjusted income from your tax return.

This also means I'll need to do my taxes.

Over the weekend, TA decided that I needed a day trip so she got discount tickets to the aquarium in Gatlinburg and we spent Sunday looking at the sea critters. I took lots of pictures, but not many good ones. Sharks will NOT sit still for their photo op, no matter how much you beg.

Last week I also looked in to getting disability. I have four of the ailments listed on their approval list, plus a plethora of others. I really don't want to work anywhere else after dealing with Gorilla Head.

I haven't shared all the crap he's pulled since he's been at The Asylum. I think the worst day was when he failed to show up one day and emailed me to send a customer an order acknowledgement. Unbeknownst to him, I was up to my ass in alligators, putting out fires in his absence. The next morning, he came in and the customer called. GH yelled from his office (he didn't care if I was on the phone or in the middle of something, he would just holler from his troll hole and expect me to hop to it) and I rolled my chair over to his door. He asked me if I'd sent the acknowledgment like he'd told me and I said, "Not yet."

He proceeded to ream me a new one, while he had the customer on the phone, not on hold, not covering the mouth piece, yelling, "WHEN I TELL YOU TO DO SOMETHING I EXPECT YOU TO DO IT RIGHT THEN! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IF YOU'RE BUSY, JUST DO WHAT I SAY!."

It didn't go over well.

After he hung up the phone, I appeared, like a demonic vision in his doorway. There were lots of "Don't you EVER.." and "Unprofessional behavior" type accusations being tossed his way. I was livid.

It's really no wonder I got the ax.

Dr. B, our German daddy, is supposed to be in on 4/4. I wonder if he knows I'm gone. I always made sure he had fresh, hot, very strong coffee and he always asked me if I was happy. I know he and GH have been in to it a few times. I half expect to hear from him.

I've had a hard time distancing myself from The Asylum. I still worry about orders that I know were supposed to go out. I miss Lulu and Thelma. Neither of them will talk to me. I've been shunned.

Oddly, I did get a call from Twatwaffle. She'd heard about the Long Lost Daughter drama and wanted to reach out to me. I'd always said we'd get along outside the office, but she was a huge pain in the ass to work for.

I've been going 'round and 'round trying to figure out what to do in the future. I really can't stand the thought of going back in to an office with an asshole boss. I'd like to get disability, but I'm not going to apply until I talk to the doc on the 30th. I like to make things, but I don't want the hassle of running a website. I do have one of those shelter tent thingies you see at craft shows. I saw it at Big Lots on clearance for $40 and grabbed it. I've not even had it out of the box. I could probably make enough side money selling crafts from the front yard in the summer to make ends meet. Maybe do a few Tarot readings. The house is paid for. Jolene is paid for. I could grow a few veggies in the back yard and get a few more chickens for eggs. I'd be happy.

Of course, there is also that book I never had time to write.

I guess I'd best get to doing something. Don't ya'll worry, I'll be writing ever step of the way. Thank you for all your kind comments, I read them over and over when I'm down.

For now, there are dishes and laundry and critters to tend to. Ya'll take care, we'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!


Renn said...

I really hope that Dr. B finds you to talk when he gets to town. He needs to know what goes on there when he's not in town.

When I got laid off last year, my pastor was the first to tell me to take at LEAST 2 weeks to unwind,let go of stress and READ. It was a great recommendation, and I think you should do the same.

Anonymous said...

maybe if the owner reaches out to you you might get rehired and the a--h--- get,s fired as the owners will be hearing complaints from their buyers and if that guy wasn,t doing his job he,ll be replaced but i hope you get the disability wishing you luck and god blessings

Mahala said...

I quit my job almost a year ago. I had a boss/supervisor who made my days hell. No matter what I did, it was wrong o it was right and there was no way she was going to say I did it right. Many others saw it and yet were just as afraid of her wrath, so I left.
I feel your pain of not knowing what to do and all.
Take it easy and try and relax a little.

kenju said...

What Renn said - and I wish you good luck in all your endeavors. Try not to worry and get stressed out. Too bed we don't all live closer to you.

Traci Dolan said...

Hang in there, Mahala. I'm rooting for you!! It's much easier to get disability if you're over 50, although "easy" is a relative term. Awesome that you got to go to the aquarium.

Significant Snail said...

Life is truly a wonder, is it not? $3 copay AFTER your insurance expires... I was laid off a few years ago and it was so stressful but so good to have some down time too. Gave me time to think about what I really want out of a job. Ended up having to take a job that was more nightmare than not but this past fall I finally landed a better one. Hopefully disability and some crafting will be in your future.

Thank you, as always, for sharing with us! XXXOOO

Travel said...

Sounds like you are still decompressing, it takes a while. It will all work out.