Outbreaks, Wildlife Dangers and NYC

Steam is slowly rising from the fresh, hot potato cakes sitting on the stove, there's a bowl of corn on the counter and thick chunks of the company Christmas bonus ham are sizzling in the frying pan. The honey glaze, caramelizing slowly and filling the air with it's sweet aroma, brings back memories of big family gatherings around the dining room table in the house where I grew up.

I'm not sure how much I miss all the kinfolk or the booze fest complete with hootin' and hollerin' that usually followed dinner, but I miss that house ... and Ma's cooking.

Christmas was peaceful here in the holler. Ma and the Amazon opened their gifts and Ma even sat in here amongst the living for a while afterwards. Aside from Ma's sudden outbreak of hives, we had a pretty nice holiday.

~*~
Due to the previously mentioned hive outbreak, I had to make a run to the dollar store this morning for a giant tube of cortisone cream and some antihistamines. On my way back, I damned near ran off the road when I saw, rising from our yard and spreading it's ginormous wings as it flew across the road, a large bird. My first thought was that it was a bird of prey, either a hawk or an eagle and that one of my worst fears had been realized. I just knew that my wee little Yoda had been mistaken for a rodent and had been snatched from our yard, probably just as he hiked his leg to pee.

It flew low to the ground, grazing the windshield of an oncoming SUV and nearly causing the white knuckled little old lady who was driving to have a heart attack. I stopped and watched in horror as it flew towards the vacant lot. I stopped the truck, prepared to leap out and rescue my tiny dog from the hideous beast, armed with nothing more than the grocery cooler bag I kept in the back seat.

You can probably imagine how silly I felt, sitting in the truck in the middle of the four lane with a death grip on my cooler bag when the giant beast landed and I realized it was just a crane, stoppin' for a chillax in the frog pond.

Yoda was safe. Ma and the Amazon questioned both my eyesight and my sanity when I told them what had happened. Ma looked out the kitchen window over at the frog pond, looking for the crane.

She didn't see anything.

~*~

I've been thinking lately about how it's been a while since I hopped on a plane and took off for a few days. Those of you who've been around here for a while will remember my trip to Vegas a few years back. Readers and chat buddies from way, way back know I got a wild hair up my ass one year and went to Vancouver for a week.

I think it was my birthday that got me started thinking about it. I was watching them light the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center when it dawned on me that I was forty three and I still hadn't ever been to New York. I began entertaining the idea of a trip north.

Nothing major, just a weekend, just to say I've been there, done that... ya know?

So then, Christmas Eve morning we were invaded by blessed by a visit from my trashy big boobed cousin with the lazy eye's youngin. She came in wearing a t-shirt three sizes too big, clam digger britches and flip flops, making a bee line for Ma.

"How was your trip?" Ma asked.

"It was good. There was alot of snow," the not-so-wee one answered.

"Trip?" I inquired. I figured they were talking about a school trip or something, I hadn't heard anything about a trip. "Where did you go?"

"New York," she answered matter of factly before she went skipping off, Ma waddling behind her.

I sat on the couch and stared down the hallway, trying to figure out why, how and wtf the child was doing in New York. It wasn't until my trashy big boobed cousin with the lazy eye came to collect her youngin that the Amazon informed me that she'd met my cousin's new boyfriend (it's still unclear if this is boyfriend number two or three since leaving her married-to-someone-else long time live in boyfriend... like a month ago,) and that he was... tada! from New York.

I reckon Cousin Big Boob took the wee one and drove up to the Big Apple with her newest love interest to meet the family.

Ya'll do realize this means that now I HAVE to go... don't you?

~*~
Anywho... I hope ya'll had a good one, whatever you chose to celebrate. We're all fine down here in the holler.


We'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!