Mahala: Performces Daily in the Yard and At the Store

My Sunday so far:

I over estimated the amount of water I poured in to the coffee maker this morning. Instead of using the pot to measure, I just eyeballed it while I chugged it in from the water jug out of the fridge.

My eyeballs can not be trusted. I'm still finding coffee puddles around the appliances.

A Sunday paper was delivered this morning, but apparently only as an afterthought. It was thrown up in the yard, way down at the other end, I'm assuming because they were almost past the house when they remembered to toss one my way. I was too lazy to get dressed before retrieving it, so I'm pretty sure all the church goin' holler folks got a show as I waddled across the yard in my thread bare, somewhat stained, lay around the house thingie and hot pink flip flops.

Go ahead. Ask me if I give a big rodent's rump.

The grocery trip yesterday was depressing. I didn't have much to spend, which normally isn't a big deal for me, it just presents a challenge, which I sort of enjoy. But yesterday, because I had limited fundage, I asked Ma if she could maybe kick in a few bucks for Cokes.

She screwed her nose up, waved some money at me and said, "Don't buy any Cokes, I don't need them anyway. Take this.. take it.." then, through gritted teeth (all both of them) she growled, "I said take it."

"Are you sure?" I asked. The woman never goes without Cokes. Not just any Cokes. Cans are a big no no and you can forget 2 liter bottles. She'll tolerate the 20 oz in a pinch, but she prefers the smaller ones, which you can only buy at the grocery store, 25 minutes away.

"I said I don't need them."

Ooooooo kay. She was pouting about something, Lord only knows what, so I spent the entire trip worrying that she'd over heard me say something and misunderstood, rehashing every conversation the Amazon and I had had the past few days, worrying myself in to a tizzy. When I got to the store, I had extreme unfit daughter guilt because I didn't buy soft drinks. I burst in to tears on the cereal aisle because I although there was plenty of cereal on sale, none of them were the kind I had coupons for.

I called her from the feminine hygene display because there was a new, more absorbent variety of her brand of peed-a-little pads, to ask if she wanted me to get those instead. She was still kinda short with me, just enough to make me feel thirteen years old again.

I stayed in a wad the whole time I was there.

I bawled all the way home because although common sense told me I had plenty of groceries to last us until the next pay day and actually, for what money I had to spend, I did a damn good job, I still allow my mother to make me feel like it's all my fault. The economy, my shorter hours at work, her bad health, her failed marriage... you name it.

I can't even blame raging hormones. I guess sometimes, when you've walked around trying to keep a stiff upper lip, putting on a brave face and telling yourself that it's all going to be okay, you just have to lose it. Let it out. Take your finger out of the dike and just let it all flow, up in to the atmosphere where it can slowly fade away.

I have this one customer, who I'm pretty chatty with. She's Ma's age, single and struggling to make ends meet while working for a butt wipe of a boss. I guess you could say we have a lot in common. She keeps telling me that her wealthy brother says the economy is going to flip around the instant the election is over. She says that he's always right about these things and she has faith in what he says.

So that's my new mantra. When the proverbial shit hits the fan, sending it's financial splatter against the Martha Stewart decorated walls of my dreams, I just smile and say, "It's okay. Juanita's brother says it's all going be okay, in just a little while."

Lulu finds this amusing. She has mentioned, half jokingly, that perhaps I may want to consider the possibility that I've finally lost my chit.

Hey.. whatever gets you through the day, right?

I'm off to enjoy my Sunday, I suggest ya'll do the same. We'll talk again soon.

Later Taters!

P.S. For those of you who asked, the county fair is October 10,11 and 12. Email me for more information, but seriously, it's probably going to end up being some dude pulling trash barrels, converted to kiddie cars behind his tractor and one popcorn machine.