Muttly, Ferguson and the Cutie Patootie

I got a call from one of my former supervisors yesterday. He's a cutey patootie, the best boss I've ever had and if he ever leaves his Barbie doll wife (they are extremely happy and the most sickeningly adorable couple I've ever met, I'm just sayin'), I'll be jumping in line. He works at the other plant now, but we still talk on the phone a couple of times a week. The call went something like this:

Me: "Hello, this is Mahala.."

Patootie: "Guess what the temperature is in Las Vegas RIGHT NOW."

Me: "Geeze, would you stop doing that?"

Patootie: "JUST GUESS!!!!"

Me: "I know, it's like 110. My fat ass is going to melt from the heat, leaving only a big greasy puddle on the sidewalk at the feet of an unemployed Elvis impersonator."

Patootie (now snickering like Muttly the dog of cartoon fame): "You're going to go out there and lose it all."

Me: "All of WHAT? Besides, I don't plan on doing any gambling. There's a stand-up performance I wanted to see, that's the main reason I'm going."

Patootie: "OOO who?"

Me: "Craig Ferguson."

Patootie: "Who? No wait, he's got a talk show right? Isn't he like... Canadian?"

Me (laughing): "Ummm no. He's not Canadian. He's...."

Patootie: "Phew, good. You had me scared. You seem to have a history of hopping on airplanes to run off and see Canadians."

Me: "ONCE! And you know you're not supposed to mention the Canadian."

Patootie: "Are you sure Ferguson's not Canadian?"

Me: "HE'S NOT CANADIAN!!!! He's Scottish, ya dork."

Patootie: "Oh ok. I knew he was a furriner. I like Scottish people, I think I'm Scottish."

Me: "Ummm, you do? So you like, just decided that just now, that you're Scottish?"

Patootie: "Yes, no one's searched my family tree so I don't know for sure, but I like Scottish people so from this point on, I've decided that I'm Scottish."

Me: "You're such a goofball."

We talked for a bit longer, Patootie had to google the hotel I'm staying at and decide if it met with his approval. I had to give him my flight information, get lectured on going to the big bad city alone, listen to a few more weather reports and generally get the big brother treatment for the duration of the call.

Sometimes I forget that I do have friends, people in my life who really do care what happens to me. Maybe if I'd stop going around pretending that I can handle whatever the universe dishes out, I'd learn to accept a little help along the way.

I'll work on that :)